Life...Lessons...Messages...

Life is so strange, it can be so perfect 1 minute and so crazy messed up the next.

My little Family has been faced with some hard decisions the last few weeks. These decisions have stirred up emotions we never thought we would have...love, hate, sadness, loss, fear, anger, joy, thankfulness, rage, optimisim etc. Ben, Me and our Boy's have been so blessed to have such WONDERFUL amazing supportive Family and Friends. I can't even explain how loved and cared for we feel.
Today while talking/crying/freaking out on the phone with my Mom she said..."You need to be strong, you need to give your problems to the Lord and trust in him." I felt irritated like she was minimizing the situation. Well, just a few hours later I was Blog Jumping when I came across a (literally) Friends of a Friend of a Friend's blog and found this:

All I could say (with more tears in my eyes...) was WoW. Thank you Mom for opening my eyes and reminding me to TRUST my Father in Heaven. Thank you God for being my BEST Friend, for taking the pain and anxeity off my shoulders into you hands, and for the amazing family you have chosen me to love.

~ Michael Jackson 1958 - 2009 ~

What a talent, you will be missed!

To My Youngest Son...

~ A baby is a miraculous gift from God, no matter how one receives it. Some are given the ability to bear them, others the ability to rear them ~

Jensen,
I am writing this to you so that you will ALWAYS & FOREVER no matter what remember me!
First of all, I remember when you were so tiny before I had even met you. Your Dad would always brag and boast and show us lot's of pictures of you at work. I used to think to myself what an amazing, loving, caring Dad you had. I told him often that I thought he was wonderful and you were so lucky to have him.
Then I became good friends with your Daddy. He brought you over to Grandma & Grandpa Kendrick's to visit one day... I couldn't believe it. I still to this day remember that he brought you chicken nuggets, you sat on his lap while he carefully fed you. You were so amazed by the dogs (you still are!!) Anyway, I remember we played outside on the grass, you weren't even walking yet. While I was getting to know you, I was falling head over heals in love with your Dad. We were full speed into a complicated mess!
After life slowed down and we became stable, you became a bigger part of my life. You got to meet your older Brother's Jaden & Jack, you were introduced to many new Family members...(Grandparents, Great Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins etc.) and lot's of Friends. Everyone would laugh and say to me, "I thought you didn't want anymore kids" or "I thought you were done" or "too bad you didn't get a girl." I laughed at all these things but knew in my heart we were meant to meet. You slowly started spending more time with us and the sleep overs...they were the best. You and Daddy would sleep at my house because Daddy was on call for the mortuary, this way if he got called out we wouldn't have to bug you while you were resting.
I had gotten rid of all my "baby" things because it was true...I hadn't planned on anymore, but Daddy and I bought new stuff! Before long my room had been turned into a Baby room! I had diapers in my dresser, baby soap in my bath tub and a crib next to my bed BUT... I was in Heaven!
After a few months Daddy and I decided that we would all live together. We wanted to give you, Jaden & Jack the opportunity to grow, live and be as happy as possible!
It has been almost 1 year since I met you and I fall in love with you more and more every day. I think about you every minute and, miss you every second that your away. I just wanted to tell you, I love you like you are my own flesh and blood...most the time I forget that you AREN'T. In the time I have had the opportunity to know you, you have started walking, running, dancing, singing, laughing, talking etc. Some of the things you say right now are: Ma, Dad, Jadie, One, Welcome, Jaden, Jack, PaPa, NaNa, Sponge Bob, Bolt, Nemo, Door, Bum, Nose, More, Yum and so much more. You LOVE cars, trucks, tractors, 4 wheelers, motorcycles...really, anything with wheels. When we ask you what certain animals say, you make this high pitched squeal and laugh so hard. My favorite game (1 that you play with ONLY me) is the "Hug-Hug Game" It's a game I made up with you. I sit on the floor and ask you if you want to play...you smile so big run to the kitchen, turn around, and run as fast as you can smiling & laughing with your arms out. You get to me, put your head on my shoulder (always the left one) and we hug and laugh. Then... we do it all again, over & over & over.
I love you so much! Thank you for being such an amazing Son, Thank you for letting my love you and kiss you and take care of you. Thank you for loving, kissing, playing and taking care of me. Thank you for being an AWESOME lil Brother to Jaden & Jack and Thank you for sharing your Daddy with us! We are the luckiest family around and I can't wait for all the years to come.

Love,
Jadie (Dadie)

P.S. I added the new song "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus to my play list. It's very common right now, and for some reason every time I hear it... I think of you!

TwO BiTs...

I have the cutest story about Jaden. Again... this is for journal purposes!!

Jaden told me this morning that he found a $2 Bill at school yesterday. I asked him what he did with it (hoping he could pay his share of the water bill or something LOL) he looked at me like I was stupid and said "I turned it into the lost & found Mom." is it dumb that I am so proud of him?

Something I believe in...

If you do not believe in Angels, Spirits, Ghosts etc. do not continue to read this post. If you do, I hope you enjoy 1 of my many experiences.

Last night I got a text, from Jensen’s Mom Alison. She told me that Jensen had a nightmare on Monday night and when she went in to get him he was pointing at his crib crying. She went on to tell me that it freaked her out and her and Jensen slept together the rest of the night. My belief in Angels, Spirits, Ghosts (whatever you want to call them) is something I am proud of. The thing I don’t like… people seem to judge others beliefs deeming people like me…CRAZY. Well, maybe to you I am but all that matters is ME! So…back to the story, I tell Alison that it was a “good” spirit (I do believe there are “bad” ones) I could feel that it was in deed a "good" one! I tell her, I know she’ll think I’m crazy but I think it could have been my Grandma Shirley peeking in on a VERY SPECIAL Baby that I am in love with. My Grandma and I were best friends, she really was my life. I recall the times I would scream and cry (much like Jaden does today with my Dad) when I didn’t get to see her everyday or when I couldn’t sleep over every weekend. She was an incredible person and an AWESOME Grandma.

Anyway, Alison and I continued to talk about this, that & the other then we ended our conversation. Honestly, I didn’t think much of it until I went to bed. I said my prayers and thanked God for my Grandma who I know is with me often and always looking out for me.

Today on my way to work I was listening to the radio, they were playing some “guess the name” game. I was in a zone, not really thinking about anything when all of a sudden the name was guessed, I got the chills…HERBERT!! Are you serious? Herbert? Who has that name these days? Whoever did? Well, the answer to that question is… my Brother Brady, it was a nickname given to him 27 years ago! He was only called this by Grandma Shirley; I haven’t heard her say this for 17 years. In fact… I haven’t heard her at all in 17 years. She passed away at the young age of 57 from Cancer in 1992. God, how I miss her.

So you’re thinking…WIERDO!!! Think what you wish, BUT I know it was a message from my Grandma telling me IT WAS HER WATCHING OVER MY 3rd Son!!! I love you Gram!

P.S. I changed my song, this is the song that was performed at My Grandma's funeral. 17 years later... it still brings a tear to the eyes all the Girl's in my family.

Swimming with... Lot's of Boys!

Sunday I was lucky enough to have my Nephew Thomas spend the day with us! The best thing... the weather was perfect! So I called my BFF Lydia and told her to bring her little Boy over to swim! I prepared mentally and physically to handle 4 of my own boys, 2 under 2! Lydia & Byron showed up right on time and off we went. A few hours into it, Sarah and her little man Kaden showed up... it was a great time!
These pictures aren't the best, they are from my phone since I left my camera at my Dad's!

Jensen in his floaty... he freakin loved it!

Jensen chillin'

Thomas in his floaty... he wasn't too sure at first BUT, he unded up loving it!
Thomas chillin'

Jaden (my life saving helper) with his 2 favorites!

I told you there were lot's of boys!! Actually... at 1 point I said "I don't think there is even 1 girl in the pool." Sarah and I looked around and... there wasn't!!
When we got home EVERYONE was pooped! Jensen and Thomas were watching a movie, Jens fell asleep but not little Busy Body! I went in to check on them and Thomas had his finger in Jensen's mouth like a Dentist!!

B Y who?

Ok... long story short!!! Ben's Sister Hannah and her Husband Eric are die hard BY (gag, I can't even type it out) fans. Last weekend we had a Family get together and decided to show them who really ROCK's THE HOUSE!!!

Jeannie & Stephan

Ok... it was all Stephan

Final Product

Oh ya, Lydia was in on it too!!

Hannah, I know we may have started war but remember... be nice!!!

Baseball

Baseball season is about to come to an end, Pee Wee that is. It is always a bitter sweet thing for us. We will miss all the parents, all the kids, the coaches, the 2 hour practice's 4-5 times a week and the games however, baseball consumes your life. I am so lucky to have had my Dad be 1 of the Coaches. It is so nice to only have to take Jaden 1 way for practice. We usually drop him off and my Dad will bring him home, I can't imagine how much money he has spent this season on Slurpees. Anyway... Jaden has done AMAZING, he has played many positions including Pitcher, 1st Base, 3rd Base & Short Stop. Oh ya... he was the only 7 year old nominated to try-out for All Stars!!! Here we come Derek Jeeter (I know, he's Yankees but we love him!) Here are just a few pictures of the past few months.

Look at my boy! I love this kid so much.

Look at that BUTT

B E A U T I F U L

Warming up the arm with Coach Grandpa in between innings.

SPORTSMANSHIP

The Fan Club

Coach "Grandpa"

Coach Bart

FIRE

Last Friday we wanted to do something fun and different as a family. I told Ben that since I always plan our nights, he needed to come up with an idea. While the day went on I was thinking of things in my head that we could do... go on a hike, drive thru the canyon, go out to eat etc. When I got home, to my surprise my love had pulled it off!!! He said, "let's go to dinner then to your Dad's to sit by the fire." WoW... I was so proud of him and I had so much dang fun just playin'! So stinkin' cute!

This is our "white-man's" fire! Thanks Dad!

Playin a little H-O-R-S-E

Ridin' Dirty...

Grandpa teachin' Ding how to clean up Dog Poop!

Jensen riding Pumpkin!

Lil' Jack riding Pumpkin

"Hey Kate, I have a secret... I love you"

Daddy is a dork!

Thanks babe for a PERFECT end to a ROTTEN day!