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Monday, November 2, 2009

Alicia and Mama...

Growing up I had a Friend who I thought would always be a part of my every day life, her name is Alicia. When I would visit or hang out with her I would get the pleasure of visiting her Mom, Jan. Well much like life... Alicia and I faded apart, she was married with a baby and I was playing, living life to the fullest. I only remember running into her once at a gas station but I always thought of her. I was bitter that we had lost touch but I always wished the best for her. A little of over a year ago when I started blogging I ran across Alicia's, I became a blog stalker for sure! We started talking thru comments and eventually text messages.
August 13th Alicia sent me a text that her Mom was sick and needed surgery for her thyroid... I wanted to be there for her, I wanted to help her and hold her but now, I was married with 3 little boys. I would text her and pray for her but I felt it wasn't enough. Mama Jan was getting worse fast, in the last days of September Alicia made the hardest decision of her life and placed Jan in a Rehabilitation center.
Jan went in for surgery in August and never recovered. She devoloped dementia and fell several times ultimatley breaking her arm.
Alicia and I had regained the friendship we once had and I decided it was time to go see Jan. I was so scared, I didn't know if she would remember me or even like me now...but that day changed my life.
A few days later Alicia and her Husband Gavin were leaving for a MUCH NEEDED break/vacation to Mexico. Alicia was excited and scared all at the same time. Excited to go but, scared to leave Mama. I promised that I'd take care of Mama visiting her, calling her, making sure she had plenty of "canned" Coke and lots of Gummy Lifesavers (a constant request). During this time I bonded with Jan, I couldn't wait to get there and hang out with her. One day she asked me where Alicia was, when I told her Mexico I said let's take a picture of ya and send it to her... this is what I got....


Alicia came home and wouldn't ya know it... brought the Swine Flu with her. That week I continued to visit Mama watching her get worse and worse. Friday October 16th I called Alicia (who was staying away to prevent Mama from getting sick) and said "you need to get there...FAST...she's not good." Alicia went right away, a few days later Jan was admitted to the IMC intensive care unit. She was bad, she had several heart attacks, blood clots etc. She wasn't good. I became ill with a cold and couldn't go see her but Alicia was keeping me updated via text and phone conversations. On Saturday evening I called Alica and told her I was planning on visiting Mama Monday morning, Alicia added me to the Family list as a Daughter so the Hospital wouldn't harass me. It would be that same day that Alicia would call me hysterical in the middle of the night telling me Jan had been rushed into emergency surgery. Sunday morning I got up, left my house in my pajamas and went to my Parent's. Alicia called me crying and said "can you come now?" I left at that moment...not even changing my clothes. As i was driving I got a text saying "hurry please." I swear...I was at the IMC in 5 minutes flat. When I walked into Jan's room she was bad... The sweet nurse explained to me that they were waiting for family to make some hard decisions. It wasn't long before an empty room with lots of tubes and medicines became full of scared Family and Friends. Alicia had asked me to stay, I didn't want to, I was scared... Never actually watching someone pass away... BUT, I put my fears behind me and supported my newly found long lost Friend. About an hour later life support was turned off and Jan flew to Heaven.

God works in mysterious ways! For a week I questioned why I had to be there, why me? The answer I came up with... A life long Friend needed me. God helped Alicia and I find eachother because he knew Jan would be coming home with him soon. I'm so thankful I could be there, Jan doesn't know it but she has helped me make many new decisions in my life, one... to go back to school so I can take care of people like her forever. Thanks for everything Jan, don't forget to pop in on me now and then!

Alicia... I love you to the moon and back, FOREVER!!!

1 comment:

Coatsy's said...

OMG, i am sitting her bawling my f&%$#@! eyes out... i love you so much & i my words can't explain enough how grateful & blessed i feel to have you in my life.... i would have never been able to make it through this. you were there to wipe my tears, let me scream (you even offered to let me punch you) lol & you were there to hold me up especially when i needed it most.. i would ask you all the time why does god hate me, why, why, why???.. my mama & i are so lucky to have you in our lives way back then & now..... i promise not another day will go by without me telling you I LOVE YOU TO THE MOON & BACK... Forever!!!! you are such an amazing person & friend & i will cherish our friendship always.... we as mama's gotta stick together.....
p.s i freaking love that picture of my mama flipping me the bird... i will forever remember when i recieved that, i was sitting at the beach & i also pissed myself cause i laughed so hard... cause it totally is her... it is no my screensaver on my phone.. so everytime i get a call i think of my mama & you!!!! Love you